Walking With Ghost....

   I thought long and hard about what my next book should be. I wondered if what I really wanted to write about even mattered.

   Would anybody care?

   Then...I looked in my "inbox". I saw all the messages from people. All different walks if life. All different needs. Every last one needing some type of answer.

   Closure.

   The permission to move on. To grow. It got me thinking. Sure...some were paranormal in nature. I'd say about 2/3rds on them, actually.

   But not all....

   No...some were simply looking for advice. Someone to talk to about things they may not tell another living soul. Things they are embarrassed by or feelings of loneliness. Dread that has lingered over past mistakes.

   I wondered why they came to me. What had I done to deserve such trust? In all honesty, I'm still not sure...but I have an idea.

   You see...I've never understood some of what I see on social media. I've never understood the need to lie. The need to portray myself as something I'm not. I will be the first in line to admit my short comings. My faults. I'm in competition with no one. Not because I'm so great but because I simply don't care. I wish success and happiness for others because it's what I would want for myself.

   Sure...I've fallen prey to others. I've helped others when I probably shouldn't have. I've stayed quiet when I've been certain of another's motives. I've silently wished for others to open their eyes to the ruse that is right before them.

   I'm not perfect...but I am HONEST. To a fault, really. And that is what this next book, "Walking With Ghost" is about. My journey. Both paranormal and otherwise. Life and love. Joy and anger. Ups and downs. Everything from the last few years that has made me the person I am today. A person people trust. I want to share my experiences with others. So that they can see a person who doesn't portray false perfection. They need to see a person with flaws. A person who is growing BECAUSE of the choices, both good and bad, that she's made. A person who is following her dreams without compromising what she holds in her heart. I want people to know it's OK to make mistakes. It's OK to fail a few times so long as you never give up.

   )O(
   Blessed Be

Is that your soul I feel or are you just happy to see me....

   Alright, folks...I warned ya. Now that I have a full size keyboard right in front of me shits about to get REAL.

   That's right. Auntie Nessa is gonna wax poetic about souls. You heard me...The big "S". Le energy muy importante!!! (Did I spell that right? Lol!) Anywhoooo....before I get way off on a tangent trying to come up with funny ways to describe a soul...I'll get back to the task at hand.

   I've seen a lot...and I mean ALOT...of pics lately, on the internet, of supposed photos proving that souls exist. Or at least attempting to. Now...I'm not knocking the idea. Nor am I making light of a persons need to visualize what cannot be seen, normally, with the naked eye. Not by a long shot.

   But here's what I find fascinating. Are you with me? Cause this is gonna be a good one...promise!! Ok...here it goes......

   For all those people out there who need to see evidence of a soul in order to believe in it, this is the question I pose to you...

   "What are you?"

   Now...before you get offended I want you to really think about that. What ARE you? It's a simple question but probably one of the hardest anyone would ever have to answer. Your first answer will either be human, man or woman...right? It might be mother, father, brother or sister. It could be many different things and any one of them would be right. That having been said I can guarantee one answer that NONE of you thought of.

   Meat puppet.

   Yep...read it again. You heard me right. Meat puppet. Talking flesh sack is another one. Walking opinionated asshole could be another, who knows? The fact is NONE of you thought that. I would be willing to bet just about anything on it. You know why you didn't think that? Because deep down...some deeper than others....you know you are made up of a soul. You may not be able to see it. You may not be able to touch it. But you KNOW.

   Our souls are, literally, what makes us US. Your soul is what guides you. Your soul is that tiny voice in your head. That feeling in your gut that will never lead you astray. Your soul is the very essence of who you ARE.

   Sure...it has it's good days and it's bad days. After all....nothing is perfect. But that doesn't change the fact that your soul is YOU. Without a soul we simply are walking, talking piles of flesh and bone. Did you ever think of it that way? Have you ever wondered whether or not you truly had a soul? Simply by wondering you have already proven that you do.

   We have all heard of soulless killers or people who had eyes that seemed soulless. Hell...I've even seen a few myself. ***shudder*** I can't say for certain that these people don't have any soul in them. What I CAN say is that those who go against their own conscience and follow a life of self-indulgence at the cost of others....or those who are so evil that they brutally take the lives of others may have had souls in the past but, through their own personal choices, are slowly killing it off. When this happens, I believe, that's when you see people as shells of what they used to be.

   You also have those instances where, sometimes, a persons soul has been so brutalized through life that they have a hard time acclimating to the world when the brutality stops. I have seen this too.

   Keep in mind this is all speculation, on my part. I am no expert on souls. No one is. I can say I'm comfortable in the soundness of MY soul and need no photographic proof of it's existence. Food for thought....

P.S...I wanted to say thank you to all my friends who sent me those pics you found on the internet. They truly were the inspiration for this blog. You guys are amazing!!!!

   Blessed Be )o(

  

The Paranormal "Pit"

   I thought this a fitting title, due to personal observation over the past year or so. Why, you ask? Well......if you insist, I'll tell you.

   Here goes nothing....

   You see...I'm an observer of human behavior. A people watcher. I notice EVERYTHING. I don't always act on it. Nor do I always say anything. But I think I'm changing my tune on that.

   Over the past year I have learned one very important lesson. Be VERY CAREFUL who you tie your name too. If you're like me, an author, your name is your brand. It is LITERALLY your MONEY MAKER. It is IRREPLACEABLE. It is also IRREPARABLE if you fall from grace over the company you keep. Before you get involved with a person, or a group, RESEARCH. Ask questions. Observe their behavior. How do they speak about themselves? How do they speak about others? Are they ALWAYS the victim? Are they ALWAYS under attack? Do their words ring true? Have you caught them in lies? Do they WILLINGLY admit wrong doings?

   This may seem severe. It may seem paranoid but, trust me, I've learned the hard way. This rings especially true for paranormal groups. We....as groups AND individuals....are already under fire. Even the smallest indiscretion can be more destructive than you know. Food for thought....

   Blessed Be )O(

Growing pains...

   What a year its been!!!! In the last year my work (what some would call a "hobby") has taken me to Memphis, England, Scotland and Virginia. I've been lucky...and I mean LUCKY....to have worked with some of the best paranormal investigators in the field. They may not be the most well known...yet....nor do they care. But their ethics, morals and compassion are without equal.

   In the past year I have started my life over. On MY terms. I have faced my demons are won. Or, at least, called a truce. Lol.

    I gave my heart away....and I took it right back. Maybe in pieces, at first, but that's okay. I know my worth. I simply refuse to compromise on it.

   I've been used. Ridiculed. Laughed at. Loved. Cherished. Praised. Truly the best, or worst, of both worlds. The full spectrum.

   I know who, and what, I am now. I know what I'm meant to do. I intend to spend the rest of my life doing it. Without complaint or need for approval.

   These were my growing pains. I've found self acceptance is the best cure for them.

   Blessings, my friends.

Calling all empaths......

   I've sat here, tonight, bawling like a little girl. Seriously. Sobbing. Incomprehensible mutterings my dialogue. Wanna know why?

   Do you?

   Because I care. Because I FEEL. It's uncontrollable for me. If someone is in pain, I share it. If they are ashamed, I share it. If they are hopeless.... I share it. Tis true.

   My son and I talked of those less fortunate than us. Watched videos depicting homeless "actors" on the street and peoples reactions to them. We watched an actual homeless man realize someone had left him money. Guess what he did with it?

   No...he didn't buy liquor or drugs.

   He bought a pillow and a blanket. Items he desperately needed. Then....he took it all back to the store and gave the money to a man he thought needed it more.

   Bless him.

   Someone who literally had NOTHING gave all he could to help another. Another homeless man showed kindness to a freezing child on the street when no one else had, even though hundreds had passed him.

   Thousands of people passed a "homeless" child on the street with only ONE offering help. Then the filmmaker got verbally abused for showing these atrocities.

   I think he should be commended. In this world we have become so obsessed with what is OURS that we forget it could all go away tomorrow. Since when is denying someone basic human rights, especially a child, like food or shelter something acceptable? Since when did the general public get to decide who eats and who doesn't freeze to death? Please don't come at me with "I work hard for what's mine" bullshit. I work hard too. But there's a difference. I never assumed my hard work made me better than another. It never made me more cold, more hungry or more in need of shelter. It never made me "more worth saving".

   Imagine how different the world would be if we were all empathetic. If you could feel that pain, cold, hunger or shame just once.....maybe you would see things differently.

   Blessed Be )O(

Pick me....pick me....

   I thought I'd take a moment to give ya'll my version of what a medium is. At least the only way I know it to be.

   For me, being a sensitive....which is my preferred label if I have to have one, is totally normal....and completely strange. There is no rhyme or reason to it. The messages I get can be very specific or completely like a puzzle that has to be figured out. They come in dreams. They come in front of my face when I'm driving. I rarely have a moment, in my head, alone.

   When it comes to spirit communication it varies to an even greater degree. Showers or potty time doesn't mean I get left alone. I may get a full description told to me or just a snapshot like a polaroid picture.

   I may get a name, place or date....or I'll be told of a situation I could have no way of knowing about. 90% of my readings are cold. I know absolutely NOTHING of the situation or person. I try my best to discourage people from giving me info, before a case, because I don't wish the reading to be tainted.

   What alot of people don't know is there is a difference between a psychic and a medium. A medium speaks with the deceased. A psychic knows things. Some of us do both. Some of us only do one or the other. Some of us don't do it at all.

   This is why I welcome the skepticism.  Why I encourage anyone looking for a reading to always stay on guard. Don't give too much away, in regards to what you wish to know.

   That's OUR job to know it. And if we don't,  it's OUR responsibilty to say so. Keep in mind...when I say job, I don't mean paying job. At least not for me. I don't charge for what I do. Trust me.....I have plenty of people trying to change my mind about that. Maybe I will, someday. Right now I'll be content with people just buying my books. Lol.

   As for now....it's been a poopy day and I'm sad and confused. Not much use to anyone in need of a reading so I'm doing ya'll a big favor and taking the night off. I'll be back on my game in a day or so and will get back to all of you. Much love!!

   Blessed Be )O (

Imagine it's you.....

   For those not on my Facebook,  I felt it was important to share a lil story with you.  An experience I had today that brought tears to my eyes.

   I was at the laundromat because my dryer went out.  As I was doing my laundry,  and actually having a pleasant time,  I noticed a smell.  A very bad smell.  I noticed a lil old lady had come in.  She was about 20 feet away from me but those around her were pulling their shirts up to cover their noses.  I admit...it was a very strong odor of cat poop.

   Now.... I know y'all may be scrunching your nose right now,  imagining the smell.  And I understand the reflex to do just that.  But.....what I want you to do,  instead,  is imagine you are the older lady.  Imagine living on social security due to age or illness.  Imagine only being able to wash your clothes once a month because you only get a check once a month.

   Imagine having cats because they love you and their food is cheaper.....and you can share it with them.

   Yes....you heard me right.

   Imagine THAT.  Having to eat what your pet does because it's ALL YOU CAN AFFORD.  Imagine being so lonely,  for whatever reason,  that you are willing to do that just so you have a companion.

   Can you see it?  Imagine it?

   You may be asking yourself why I care so much about people I don't know.  About people that "don't matter".  The " draining of our resources " as many like to call them....

   Well.... I'll tell you why.

   Because,  at ANY MOMENT,  that could be me.  To a certain degree,  once upon a time,  it WAS me.  After I was raped,  by an ex that found me hiding in my friends house,  I lived "on the streets".  I stayed in my car or sofa surfed at other friends houses.  I got a job at a fast food restaurant that was 3 miles away from my friends house.  When my car broke down I walked to work.  In the dead of winter in Kansas.  This restaurant allowed us 1 free meal a day.

   And that's all I ate.  I was 19 years old. I was too ashamed to ask for help for almost a year.  And even after I did,  I had already learned to keep to myself.

   I have never lost the feeling that EVERYTHING can disappear in a, SECOND.

   Now.... I bet NONE of you can even imagine that I lived like that.  I bet it's even harder to imagine it happening to you,  right?

   Well...  It can.  So..... When you cast judgement on the " dirty looking" guy on the street..... Or the lady who smells like cat poop.... Just remember.....

   At ANY moment the rug could be pulled out from under you.  You could lose EVERYTHING.  This includes money,  job,  home,  family,  self respect and hope.  If this happened to YOU......how would you want to be treated?  Food for thought....

   Blessed Be )O(